My New Life

It's strange that I haven't been working for almost 2 months. I can't remember the last time I wasn't busy working on another new project. I'm surprised that I was able to not have much human interaction all this time. I think I was getting used to having Oliver to talk to 24/7. He's a great listener.

The first few weeks of my maternity leave was all about getting things ready for Oliver's arrival, and getting extra rest and eating well. And now that seems to be the goal too, but getting enough rest means squeezing in a power nap here and there. And eating well means drinking herbal tea my mom makes to help replenish my body, and getting enough nutrients to produce the best milk for the baby.

I've always been a list maker and have the need to be organized, and work from a schedule. Having a baby who has his own schedule makes that a little bit harder. And I am learning to surrender, and let go of my tendencies to be in control. How can you resist that little adorable face, you realize you'd do anything for him.

Chris and I have been blessed with a healthy and beautiful boy. He's very even tempered and only make noises and cries when he needs something. We quickly learned to differentiate his cries to meet his needs. And even though I'd like to think crying is the only sound he knows how to make to express any discomfort, it's hard not to feel like he's hurting. I often want to cry too when I can't move quick enough to make him feel better.

The days seem to go by so fast when you're in a routine of feeding, burping, changing, and repeat. Sometimes when I'm tired it makes me feel more emotional that I can't seem to get a break. Taking a hot shower has become the only time I get to myself to pamper me. And spending a little bit of time on the computer each day to check email brings a little bit of the old me back into my new life.

Like all new parents, we've been taking lots of pictures of him each day. We can see how Oliver changes from day to day. And his facial expressions have become more intentional and telling of what he's feeling. This is the first time in my life that I am constantly surprised by his every little movement. And every interaction we have is full of hopes and dreams that he'll learn to grow up to be a happy loving person.

I'm very lucky that I've had a very easy and enjoyable pregnancy, a great experience preparing for giving birth, a memorable labor and delivery, and now a new life that challenges my strength and patience, opens my heart to new experiences and how I see life, and experience the most pure love I've ever felt. And there's so much more to look forward to.