Ann, the teacher

I just stumbled into this one, Ann, the Chinese teacher. 4 Months ago I thought I'd move to New York and either become a children's photographer (have done 1 successful shoot) or continue with graphic design. And maybe subconsciously I didn't try as hard with the design work, but nothing really came out of my few attempts to get work. What started out as just another idea now has become my new career. I approached Oliver's preschool about working as a substitute teacher thinking it would help Oliver knowing I work there. The conversation led to me teaching their 2s and 3s classes Chinese. So began the process of me cutting up felt to make little animals and types of food, hand puppets and cardboard cut outs.

Simultaneously the Chinese mom friend I made here on our 4th day in Brooklyn wanted to start a Chinese school. I was excited about it at first, but realized that I was going to be putting in a lot more time and effort into the curriculum plus teaching. It didn't feel right knowing I didn't want to have a business partner who I barely know and I didn't want to commit to anything long term. She did introduce me to another woman who also wanted to start a school. So they had me teach a trial class at one of their playgroups last week. I did a lot of preparation for the class but didn't know what to expect. It was 4 kids under 2, they can understand a little bit of Chinese but most couldn't say much. The biggest challenge was trying to keep them focused in a room packed with toys. I think I did well and had a unique take on breaking down the song lyrics to teach them the vocabulary. It was a 45 minute class and I was sweating after finishing the first out of 5 songs I prepared for in the first 5 minutes. At one point I was just making things up, but it worked out. I would interact with each child using a stuffed animal and that really got their attention. And next week I'll be meeting with the 2 ladies to talk about what my plans are for teaching.

I really didn't expect to be going down this road. I do think I am good with the kids and I am hoping to do more smaller scale tutoring. Maybe once I have some more experience and see what works then I can continue with that. I also have other ideas to turn my curriculum into a digital text book or application to sell on iTunes. I think there are a lot of opportunities and skills that I have that can take teaching Chinese to another level.

I also had another idea for a children's book...I think I better go over my list and narrow it down.

In 2 weeks I start teaching at the preschool and maybe this other class. It will be good to have a paid job. : )

Oliver at 3.5 years old

"I did it by myself!" is a phrase often heard around the house these days. Oliver continues to amaze me everyday with how much he has learned. In the last few months since we moved to Brooklyn, Oliver has found a new independence riding his scooter around town. He's gotten very adventurous with his moves. Often balancing on one foot and zig zags around the pedestrians. He continues to be respectful of the rules and will stop where I ask him to, and always wait at the inside corner of an intersection.

He now can change his own pants, put on his shoes, use a fork when he eats. He can also write his name. Today he wrote my name too! When we read now, if he comes across he doesn't know, he always asks what it means. His vocabulary has grown in both English and Chinese. He's even learned a tong twister in Mandarin about eating grapes. He also has a good sense in math. He can do simple addition when he wants 3 of something and he has 2, he will say "one more". He can also count in both languages up to 50.

After a tough month of getting adjusted to his school schedule, he finally has gotten comfortable with going. Can't say that he loves school yet, but he seems to be very proud of the drawings he's made from school. And he always sings new songs he learned. The teachers adore him and tells us that Oliver always offers to help the other children.

His favorite show has been Blues Clues which he watches in the mornings and afternoon. About 2 hours of tv a day. He's learned quite a bit from the show actually. And it's really cute when he laughs while he's watching. Recently he got a taste of Star Wars. He loves the Snow Speeders. And being very resourceful and imaginative, he used a 2 liter ginger ale bottle as a lightsaber.

A few months ago I wrote an article about how to feed a picky eater. Oliver had himself on a strict diet of mostly carbs and dairy and fruits. He did get a pretty balanced meal when I learned the best way to feed him was to separate all the food groups. Lately though he's started to become more open to other foods. He now enjoys pizza and today he had corn on the cob.

Every Monday Oliver goes to a sports class over at New York Kids Club just a short walk from the apartment. The first time he didn't want to go inside even though I wait there for him and he can see me the entire time. Then after a few classes, now he has no trouble going in, and really enjoys running around. As always he is great with following directions and the teachers love him.

On Monday mornings before sports class we have a regular playdate with a little girl named Charlotte. Her mom and baby brother Hudson comes over and play for about 2 hours. Oliver and Charlotte play very well together and he also enjoys having Hudson around. Oliver will always look for the soft toys for the baby and is very gentle around him. We recently visited the Brooklyn Children's Museum with them and had a great time.

Around Christmas was when I noticed a change in the types of things Oliver plays with. After a full year of daily Lego playing, he moved onto more pretend play. The couch with some boxes and my guitar stand has been turned into a police boat or fire truck. A step ladder has become his "high chair" for every meal and it's also been some type of air craft. He loves pretend play and often he plays the teacher, the coach, or the daddy. He loves to run laps in our apartment like we are race cars, build obstacle courses with the furniture, hide things around the house for us to find them. Catching and running away from monsters is also a favorite. When he did slow down to play with Lego, incredibly he can build a never before seen rescue vehicle. And he will never turn down a dance party. His favorite songs are "#2" and "E eats everything" by They Might Be Giants, "Witch Doctor", "Yellow Submarine", and "All Together Now".

On Wednesday afternoons we go to a Chinese playgroup so Oliver can be around other children and grown ups who speaks Chinese. It is because of this exposure that Oliver started to speak more Chinese on his own. He has great pronunciation and enjoys surprising me when he speaks it. And with my latest career path in teaching Mandarin, Oliver has been very supportive and helps me test out my material.

One thing I've been trying to do more is to have normal conversations with Oliver. We talk about what projects to work on. What we need to do to take care of the house. I share with him my childhood stories, which he enjoys and asks a lot of questions. We talk about our feelings, when we are sad or mad. It's really wonderful to feel a close connection to him and we share openly. That is something very important to me that I hope will continue no matter how old he gets.

Today we re-organized his room a little and I moved a small lamp next to his bed. He's able to turn the light on and off himself. So he suggested we try something new, that he turns the light off before I close the door. "Lights off!" I said, and he turned it off. And he went to sleep.

Although, this week he's testing the limit a bit. When I say no to something, he'll say "I'll do it myself!" Sometimes he succeeds, but he knows he shouldn't have. We're big on keeping our word so he understands that there are limits he needs to respect. He also understands how to make deals. I guess he is learning the art of negotiation.

So, he's still wonderful and loving and beautiful inside and out. Can't believe he'll be 4 in just a few months. He'll be excited to eat some Fruit Loops cereal because one time at the market he wanted them and I said "I'll get those for you on your birthday!" What a patient little boy.

Where do I start?

I've now been living in Brooklyn for 3 months. That unsettling feeling is starting to go away. I've learned how to dress for the weather, how to shop, and how to spend the 2 8-hour days while Oliver is in school. The first month was really hard. I felt impatient and scared. I'm not used to not having a project to work on, but it was difficult to start when I don't know my way around. I constantly remind myself that it's ok to take it slow.

I went out with one of my closest friend who lives in New York. She's always been a great source of support for me. During our get together, I realized that I was holding on to the past too tight. I was starting to get annoyed with myself for repeating the same "problems" and I didn't like being that person. I realized that it was ok to take a step in a new direction. So I did.

Although still frustrated with not knowing what I can do to help out financially. I decided to stop listening to other people's suggestions. After all, if I don't know the answer, how would anybody else know. I had so many ideas in all different directions. Writing, designing kids wall posters, sell crafty things on etsy.com, become a children's photographer, a professional organizer, starting a blog with tips for moms, starting a website for respectful parenting. There wasn't one thing that stood out. And I did contact my old boss about working freelance again. Maybe the timing isn't right, but it didn't feel promising. So I just have to keep moving forward.

Instead of picking one, I simultaneously starting working on half of that list. And then added a new one, to be a substitute teacher at Oliver's school, also another idea from a Chinese mom here to teach Mandarin to babies and toddlers. That last idea grew and now I'm working on a curriculum to teach Chinese at Oliver's school and maybe other playgroups.

I realize that it does help me to work on so many things at the same time. No one can tell me that I will end up getting nothing accomplished. Maybe I'm not an expert at one of them, but I am really good at most of them. And maybe this is the path to find my true self. I can somehow roll every natural talent I have into one big project.

I guess this is what happens when you move to the other side of the country. I can finally, at 36, feel like I don't need anyone's approval. And in a place where I have no roots, I can roam freely. I'm looking for a new passion. I'm looking to help someone be happier or feel comforted, or learn something new.

So I've been writing for a website called A Mom Knows. I share tips, opinions, recipes whenever I can. I literally make a penny per click, but I am happy and proud of my articles. I took photos of the baby upstairs and sold them some prints. Not much money, but it was a good start for not really knowing the camera well. I just trust I have a good eye and can capture a moment worth photographing. I designed one poster for kids wall, and plan to design more so I can start selling them. I've contacted a few blogs to review my book (actually one place contacted me but it didn't make it into the issue because of deadline reasons). I'm moving forward with teaching Chinese. And I can still design if a project comes along.

I feel content. I don't feel stressed by the long list of projects to complete. And I am hopeful that something will feel right and stand out more than the others. In the meantime, I'll just keep moving forward.